It’s one of the most frustrating occurrences in fantasy football. It’s not a Baltimore fan complaining about the refs or John Carney missing three kicks when just one would have won the fantasy game you lost by a point. No, the most sickening feeling in fantasy football hits you when you start the wrong guys. There’s…… Continue reading Foolish Thoughts: My Beef with Fleaflicker’s Coach Rating
Thanksgiving is a time for giving thanks. You should pause for a moment and think of all the players you have to thank for getting you where your fantasy team is today. Thank you, Terrell Owens, for going off the week we finally gave up on starting you. Thanks so much for being worthless just…… Continue reading Week 12 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Carson Palmer, Michael Crabtree, Steve Smith, and Pilgrim’s Pride on Turkey Day
I know nothing of Twilight. I like it that way, but this debate that’s been raging across all my television channels, including my sports channels, has annoyed me to no end, especially because they used my name. From what I can gather, my namesake Jacob is a werewolf who is loyal and the complete “nice…… Continue reading Week 11 Hot Hand and Cold Shoulders: Twilight Edward vs. Jacob, who ya got?
It’s good that it only comes after bye weeks are over when rosters have, for the most part, been figured out. Otherwise, Thursday Night Football would be a real pain. Instead, it’s just kind of a pain because you have to remember in the middle of the week, just after setting your waiver wire claims…… Continue reading Week 10 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Thursday Night Football is for Lovers
I watched Any Given Sunday last night. Twice. No matter how many times you watch that movie, it makes you want to run through a wall, and then a pack of linebackers, followed by another wall. Every. Time. I didn’t even need to drink coffee this morning. I’d already run out of walls. (Okay, that’s…… Continue reading Week 9 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Any Given Sunday
At some point, we have to stop framing recommendations to start LaDainian Tomlinson with stats from his past performances. “For his career, L.T. averages 100+ yards and bazillion touchdowns against (fill in the blank).” No crap. L.T. was a dominant fantasy force up until last season, but how much suck did L.T. average just last…… Continue reading Week 8 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: L.T. is a zombie
Patrick Crayton just straight up offended me by complaining that he wasn’t told that he was being replaced in the starting lineup. Seriously? But seriously? But seriously? I guess he was the last to know. I knew two weeks ago. Let’s just drop the act, Crayton. You saw Miles Austin have the best day of…… Continue reading Week 7 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: LenWhale fall down, go boom
I once heard that Peyton Manning can hear us think our own thoughts. In the huddle, he thinks so hard that the middle linebacker opposing him get headaches. Headaches lead to fear; fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; and hate leads to Manning’s audible at the line that allows his laser-sighted, rocket arm…… Continue reading Week 6 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: A Week Without Peyton Manning
I watched the UFL game last night, and it wasn’t even like the accidentally-left-it-on-that-channel kind of watch. I actually watched it. It was far more interesting than watching Missouri spank Nebraska in the rain. J.P. Losman led the Las Vegas Locomotives, an engine of destruction, I’m told, to a come-from-behind victory against the California Redwoods,…… Continue reading Week 5 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Pretty please, Braylon. Pretty Please.
Chadam of contributing writer to Fantasy Football Fools fame has this theory about Chad Pennington that he asked me to share. He says they broke Pennington’s shoulder on purpose so that he can have surgery and come back next season like Rookie of the Year with a cannon that can throw 70-yard bombs. Maybe he’s…… Continue reading Week 4 Hot Hands and Cold Shoulders: Rookie of the Year?